After a hectic few months, I finally have some projects that are in the early stages. But since nothing is worth posting about yet, here instead is a list of phrases that (at the time of this posting) turn up no hits on Google:
- “ate a violin”
- “driver-side bidet”
- “unlike normal furries,”
- “Sarah, plain and tall and a cyborg”
- “people are too civil on the internet”
- “his penis shattered my world”
- “more like LAME-arkian theory”
- “my little horse must think it gay”
- “it turned out her bottom half was a robot”
- “Aww, a baby hooker!”
Here are some phrases that I had hoped were original when I typed them in but was disappointed:
- “full-body glissando”
- “passenger-side bidet”
- “underwater Linux”
- “Nu-Polka”
- “erotic colonoscopy”
- “Spocktoberfest”
- “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a frack.”
- “my bologna has a first name, it’s A-D-O-L-F”
And lastly, here’s a fun bash export I stumbled on:
export PS1='C:${PWD//\//\\\}>'
A little gem:
“I am my mother’s first grade teacher”
all the way to
“I am my mother’s twelfth grade teacher”
return 0 results.
“i ate my hamster” – 1150
“he ate my hamster” – 447
“she ate my hamster” – 41
“you ate my hamster” – 166
“they ate my hamster” – 67
“we ate my hamster” – 0
“google ate my hamster” – 50
“obama ate my hamster” – 7
“xkcd ate my hamster” – 0
“hamster ate my hamster” – 3 (Cricetus Cannibalis?)
“velociraptor ate my hamster” – 0
[...] ? Google By plamenstoev ???? ???????? ?? ???? ?????????? ? ????? ?? XKCD. ? ?? ?????? ?? ??????? ???? [...]
of the form “thirty-nine results” etc:
54 got 53
77 got 1140 for some reason
85 got 87
103 got none! “one hundred three”
nothing for 104-107, but 108 gets one result, as to 109 110 111
112 gets none
captcha:
“benefit furtel” I think
looks more like benetit
… I’m refreshing this one
“greatest in” – 3,230,000
“windows vista is bad for your health” – 1 hit! totally random comment about vista.
“The damaged perfection” – 0 results
“Luke, I am a velociraptor” – 0 results
“The fourth wheel on a tricycle” – 11 results
“The fifth wheel on a tricycle” – 2 results
“The sixth wheel on a tricycle” – 5 results
“The seventh wheel on a tricycle” – 0 results
“The eighth……..twentieth wheel on a tricycle” – 0 results
“Surely You’re Joking, xkcd!” – 0 results
“Some lists made by xkcd” – 0 results
“ben stein is a douchebag” : 354 hits
“ben stein isn’t a douchebag” : 0 hits
_____ is a fracking cylon
“Mccain” 1
“Obama” 0
“Palin” 0
“Biden” 0
Mccain is a cylon?!?!? Well, if the internet says it…
“this is too weird to show on the internet” 0
“this is too weird for the internet” 0
“everything on the internet is porn” 83 (I knew it!)
“this is too weird to make porn of” 0
“i tell people i’m not a virgin” 1 (although the result is actually the opposite)
“master plan for world domination” 9330 (boy, the competition mush be harsh!)
“master plan for world peace” 16 (oh, humanity)
“master plan for for making her mine” 0
Wayne…
This post The HEMORRHOID Blog ” Blog Archive ” Laser for Hemorrhoids is just the kind of information I am looking for. I am a colon cancer survivor, so all health issues have become of great concern to me. Just so you know, I found it while looking…
“irreverent man” 2,590
“irreverent boy” 479
“irreverent honkey” 2
“irreverent sucka” 0
Crazy laugh @ nu-polka.
“I loathe things that are deep fried” – 0 results
surprise surprise.
Unlike normal furries, these featheries, are well-known for falling into fast-paced, extremely sexual and drug-filled lifestyles and are often infatuated
aha!
No results found for “recalcitrant burrito vendors”.
But there are so many of them! Vending away.
“his fault” – 2,620,000
“her fault” – 875,000
“cat litter fondue” – 0
“elvis presley’s upper crust” – 0
“mr. lincoln’s erotica” – 0
“Liar Liar didn’t give me a heart attack” – 0
“Tom Cruise not being a douche” – 0
“Fat people without a thyroid condition” – 0
This is fun.
There are a couple I’ve coined without realizing it:
Rounds up to true
Rounds down to false
Six-sigma strange
“put your hands up for energy” – 0
I just dream of it last night.
“pro Sonny Bono” 184 hits
“pro bonobo” 145 hits
“Sonny Bonobo” 361000
“pro Sonny Bonobo” 0 hits
“Sonny Bono hits” 608 hits, but the next words in the third link is “a tree.”
“squishy family jewels” and “springy family jewels” still yields zero results as of this date… :o
No results found for “drunken web searching”. Just thought ya’ll might want to know.
“never call a raptor fat” – 0
“cthulhu on a stick” – 7
“this query has zero returns” – 0 :D
“i am here to fix your appliances” – 1
“road rage polka” – 195
“pikachu salami” – 3
“internet meme pie” – 31
“i hate my life” – 673 000
“i love my life” – 858 000 :)
(I kinda want to try a cthulhu on a stick)
Also,
http://forums.nexuswar.com/viewtopic.php?t=17274&view=previous&sid=7297e3bae723d8985e7ccbb3717a9e73
Denizens of Rum island: 0
Birth of the Devil Goat: 654
Eating Raw pancreas: 8
techthulhu – 0 results.
“Thor’s Whores” – 222 results.
“dracula is lactose intolerant” – 2 results.
“What if hitler invented hello kitty?” – 0 results.
“Stalin is a sexy beast” – 1 result…
“Jesus vs. the Kool Aid Man” = 0 results.
“My life would be complete if I had porn of Mr. Rogers” – results.
I think I’m done for the day.
“make out with a grandma” – 1 result
“make out with a grandpa” – 2 results
“make out with a mother” – 0 results
Grandpas win again…
“Google couldn’t even find my underpants” – 0 results
“It turns out you shot my dog” – 0 results
“reflection nebulosity, my ass”
“plasma cutter as anti-terminator weapon” – 0 results
The wonderful thing is that every 0 result now has 1 result. It’s like we’re eradicating the 0 links!
“i’m a hermaphrodite who had a sex change” – 0 results
A guy I knew in high school told us he wanted to go on Jerry Springer under that theme…
“intercourse with a pineapple” – 3 hits
“No more punching monkeys” – 2 hits
No results found for “Ventriloquists gone wild”
omg im in tears this is so funny
“french millitary victories” hahaha
“well-written and intelligent YouTube comment” – no results
Ooh I found one!
“woman ate by artichoke” – no results
well now that you’ve posted this, it pops up on google XD
In regard to the “bologna” one, it’s because the first two results that pop up are from your website. *suspicious look*
“ninja ate my hamster” – 0
We don’t do that kind of thing.
“nice weather for loving” got 0 results last i checked
Google orbital sub-nuclear fusion mass celestial objects of roundness defined by 3<pi<4:
“Google Mercury” – 3,060
“Google Venus” – 1,460
“Google Earth” – 91,200,000
“Google Mars” – 424,000
“Google Jupiter” – 1,640
“Google Saturn” – 3,000
“Google Uranus” – 289
“Google Neptune” – 231
“Google Pluto” – 709
“Google Moon” – 164,000
“Google Phobos” – 221
“Google Deimos” – 61
“Google Io” – 41,100 (Vulcanize society!)
“Google Europa” – 10,500
“Google Calisto” – 360
“Google Ganymede” – 160
“Google Amalthea” – 6
“Google Himalia” – 1
“Google Elara”- 8
“Google-fuck Jupiter” – 0
“Google Polydeuces” – 2 (…)
“Google OGLE-2005-BLG-390Lb” – 1 (1 goto 1)
“Google PSR B1257+12 C” – 0 (A winrar!)
—
“Jupiter is fit for colonization” – 0
“Cities built on orbital” – 0
“Josef Fritzl is not that bad” – 0
“I live and breathe this BS” – 0
“wtf are torus seeds” – 0
“One yoctosecond of joy” – 0
Hmm, better make that pi = 3 < z < 4.
“Roch Voisine jello mould” 0 results
“Raptorrolled” 1 result
“linen-clad raptor” 0 results
“blood clot sandwich” seriously, 8 results
“reslut” – 158,000 results, of which my favourite is possibly “HCG Test reslut: I’m pregnant!!”
“Mom I’d Like to Google” 0 results
“You had me at hello” – 156,000
“You had me at konichiwa” – 2,240
“You had me at bonjour” – 532
“You had me at hola” – 478
“You had me at ciao” – 152
“You had me at ni hao” – 126
“You had me at namaste” – 104
“You had me at guten tag” – 10
“You had me at g’day” – 8
“You had me at salaam” – 7
“You had me at o hai” – 6
“You had me at zdravstvuite” – 1
“You had me at o-si-yo” – 0
and:
“You had me at halo” – 73,700
“You had me at goodbye” – 7,270
“You had me at good morning” – 242
“You had me at dicks fuck assholes” – 224
“You had me at let’s fuck” – 20
“You had me at your mom” – 2
“You had me at raptors” – 1 (!!)
“You had me at velociraptors” – 0
“physicists who aren’t weird”
“velociraptor attack prevention equipment”
No hits… until you put the phrases in this page. :)
Lol^1: 398000000
Lol^2: 2480000
Lol^3: 1420000
Lol^4: 720000
Lol^5 318000
Lol^6 187000
Lol^7 127000
Lol^8 83900
Lol^9 48200
Lol^10 33200
Lol^11 24300
Lol^12 22400
Lol^13 12200
Lol^14 12600
Lol^15 8910
Lol^16 6770
Lol^17 4290
Lol^18 3200
Lol^19 2480
Lol^20 1910
Lol^21 2100
Lol^22 1680
Lol^23 1650
Lol^24 1450
Lol^25 883
Lol^26 778
Lol^27 794
Lol^28 548
Lol^29 487
Lol^30 525
Lol^31 349
Lol^32 563
Lol^33 258
Lol^34 310
Lol^35 275
Lol^36 400
Lol^37 287
Lol^38 214
Lol^39 166
Lol^40 180
Lol^41 605
Lol^42 112
Lol^43 560
Lol^44 810
Lol^45 965
Lol^46 699
Lol^47 108
Lol^48 121
Lol^49 1650
Lol^50 9
Lol^51 5
Lol^52 12
Lol^53 7
Lol^54 7
Lol^55 7
Lol^56 9
Lol^57 8
Lol^58 6
Lol^59 10
Lol^60 6
Lol^61 10
Lol^62 7
Lol^63 7
Lol^64 0
“list of successful geckos”
“list of successful government initiatives”
“list of successful webcomics”
All zero. :(
this may seem a somewhat self obsessed discovery, however….
I typed my name into google in two separate browsers on my mac. In one I came 1,2 and 3 on the first page whilst on the other I was 4 5 and 7
Why were the searches not the same….or am I thinking too simplistically.
Rowland