Since last night I’ve been obsessively connecting to Omegle.
It’s a simple site that just connects you to a random person, anonymously, for a conversation.
It feels like that scene in Fight Club where the narrator sits down next to Tyler on the plane. Two strangers meeting, laying out their personality and sizing each other up in just a few words, with no expectations, and — thanks to anonymity — no consequences.
Except in this case, a lot of the time Tyler just screams “COCKS”, punches the narrator, and jumps out of the window.
Still, it’s fun!
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: If you could, would you grow elephant tusks?
Stranger: u seen 2 be quite insane..
You: whatever pedo
Stranger: huh..
You: If you could, would you grow elephant tusks?
Stranger: no
You: ok
You: i probably would.
Stranger: it seems 2 dying 4 such an oppurtunity
Stranger: hmm..i knew it..
You: but no stupid trunk
Stranger: *U
Stranger: hahhahaa..
You: those things are dumb
Stranger: ur age?
You: I’m 12,
You: im fucking 12
Stranger: could have guessed..
Stranger: y do u need 2 abuse, if u are 12..??
You: A 12 yearold with the mouth and vocab of a 40 year old business man
Stranger: hmm…so u 40yrs old..i get it..
You: Actually my name is Officer Thomas Wagner. And your under arrest sir.
Stranger: but officer i was never indulged in any crime, can i get 2 call my lawyer please..
You: No, I shot your lawyer.
You: you can still try calling if you wish
Stranger: well, i m a secret cbi officer, u r under arrest ofice..
Stranger: *officer
You: HA! your not in the secret police. A secret police would never misspell Officer.
You: its a cardinal sin
You: ..idiot…
Stranger: whatever…i think before the police station u shud b taken 2 an asylum..wat say??
You: who says im not in an asylum ?
You: already
You: huh?>
You: you scared of the crazy ??
You: Boo!
You: hahaha
You: …
Stranger: no i enjoy it at times, jus lyk nw..
You: (stares at you with dark dead eyes)
Stranger: n i still enjoy it
Stranger: haah..
Stranger: ova wd ur tricks…boooooo!!!
You: Why would you ask my age?
Stranger: out of curiosity…
Stranger: is it a crime ??
You: what the fuck does it matter? we’re strangers remember
Stranger: hmm…
You: you trying to get lucky?
Stranger: y do u feel so??
You: I may track you down and try to kill you tonight.. just to let you know.
Stranger: y r u James???
You: Im Jack
Stranger: hhahaa..
You: THE FUCKING RIPPER FUCKFACE
You: I will castrate your grandmother.
Stranger: i actually feel lucky 2 not have understood watever u wrote out der
You: YOu dont understand Jack the Ripper??
Stranger: i dont want 2
You: never heard of him?
Stranger: of course heard
You: seriously, …he’s probably the most famous serial killer of all time
You: Who the hell are you??
You: you dont know ANYTHING!
You: I HATE YOU!
You: …..
You: (stares at you with cold, dead eyes)
Stranger: i m sherlock holmes…n i pretend not 2 know things
Stranger: it actually works at times
You: well it fucking backfired this time didn’t it Watson?
Stranger: well, u think so..
You: EVERYONE thinks so.
Stranger: haahh…
Stranger: stubbornnnnnnn
You: you have no idea how many people want to kill you right now do you?
Stranger: umm…yea, kin of..
You: Look out your front window.
Stranger: update ur jokes plz
You: do ya see them?
Stranger: i dont feel like laffin any more..
You: me neither
You: I’ve been laughing my ass off this whole time
You: Shit, Your a fucking riot man!
You: Ha! tell me another
Stranger: m a girl..
You: Shit, Your a fucking riot woman!
You: happy??
You: geez
Stranger: hahahhaa…
Stranger: u funny…
Stranger: n i like it, lol!!
You: seriously though, if you really are a girl and your under 20, get the hell off this site.. its not good
Stranger: kk…mr 40 year old man, i vill..
You: Pervert predator, evil empire, sorcerers and warlocks prey here.
Stranger: hahahaha….u seriously funny…
Stranger: lmao
You: truth.
You: ok. All jokes aside, im serious about that.
You: This place makes me so depressed
Stranger: ohhhhhhhhhhh….i m shit scared…hawwwwwwwwwwww…..
You: you should be.
Stranger: stop it now,,u dragging..
You: cause I just sent your IP adress across half of the USA
You: look out.
Stranger: umm…
You: kidding.
You: im fucking with you..
Stranger: thank god
You: kinda scary huh?
Stranger: i dont like ppl abusing
You: thing is. It could happen.
Stranger: how??
You: thats the risk you take on here.
You: thats a fact.
Stranger: well, m far away from us…no worries..
You: I don’t know how they do half the stuff they do on the internet, do you>?
Stranger: umm…no….
You: be careful. just be careful.
You: oh, and NEVER i mean NEVER click on any links people send
You: Im not joking anymore
Stranger: hmm..i have never tried it..n i take ur warning very seriously, thank u..
You: please do
Stranger: u sound concerned….
You: I’ve heard thats how they get your ip adress
Stranger: funny, hw can u mould urself in so many diff. ways..
You: ya im concerned, because I hate pedofiles and pervs!
Stranger: kk…
You: so,
You: a/s/l?
Stranger: hahhaaa…
Stranger: 18 f
Stranger: urs??
You: 92/velicorapter
Stranger: hahahahahahahahahaa….
Stranger: u r SERIOUSLY funny!
You: Do you have any ketchup chips?
You: they are SO good
Stranger: umm, yea itz in the fridge..
You: in the fridge??? so they are all nice and cool and crispy??
You: Damn girl! go eat dem chips!
Stranger: noo….i il gain wieght
You: What time is it?
Stranger: as it is hav 2 much..
Stranger: in india its 16:20…
Stranger: der??
You: its almost 6 in the morning here
Stranger: wat u dng so early??
You: talking to you.
Stranger: i knew it..u wud say dis…
Stranger: i meant
You: i knew too!
Stranger: y u up so early?
You: because im a pedo…i mean because im ..uh an early riser?
Stranger: hahaha…
Stranger: gud..
You: why are you on this site?
Stranger: den stop wasting ur time, n do something fruitfull
Stranger: was bored watching tv
You: I’m afraid all my fruits have been shakin from my tree tonght
You: …i dont know what that means..
Stranger: it sounded double meaning…chee..gross!!!
Stranger: hope u dint mean it..
You: yeah…that was kind of gross..
Stranger: bad
You: it reminded me of that song
Stranger: wich 1?
You: Steve Miller band
You: really like them peaches wanna shake your treeeee
You: la la la!
Stranger: umm..less knowledge…
Stranger: sry!
You: sorryy..
You: i am a pedo you know…i cant really help it
Stranger: wats a pedo, EXACTLY???
You: A pedophile
You: is a pervert
You: that likes children
You: and im not really one
You: just kidding
You: but there are Pedos on this site
You: all the time
You: pretty sick huh?
Stranger: hahahhaa…i agree…my 2dys experience says it ol
You: yeah. i think the first sentence i got was “Can i see your tits?”
You: I was like, ..uh, no..
Stranger: its so CHEAPPPPPPPPPPP
You: I don’t believe you can sir…
Stranger: sir??
You: nevermind
Stranger: no no say
Stranger: i mean
You: sometimes its just weird young perverts too
Stranger: explain
You: like 18 year old pervs
Stranger: shut up…
You: they start young
Stranger: mr 40
You: I said i was 92
You: and a velicoraptor
Stranger: but i beliv u r 40
You: what you gonna believe?
You: ok.
You: whatever you want
Stranger: wats a velicoraptor???
You: ha!.. oh man, thats the funniest question yet
Stranger: i dnt fin it funny..
You: a velicoraptor is a dinosaur..
You: with big sharp claws
Stranger: well stop flaunting ur vocab
You: sorry… my brain has a mind of its own sometimes
You: You ever seen Jurrassic park?
Stranger: u r 40, of course u vmust b vry learned uncle.. huh.. ::(
Stranger: umm…yes…its scarry..
You: There are velociraptors in it.
You: In the kitchen scene.
Stranger: i hav got it…..
You: the kids hide from them
Stranger: u want 2 confirm???
You: roar! hissss
You: raptors
Stranger: uffoo…
You: your on missy!
You: check it.
Stranger: PLZ CHANGE THE TOPIC
You: to T-Rexs?
Stranger: wats dat now???
You: god damn!
Stranger: i feel ignorant 2 the core..
You: You don’t know what a Tyrannosaurus rex is?
You: THAT IS SOOO COOL!
Stranger: hahahhaa…
You: I respect your ignorance
You: (bow)
Stranger: stop using abbreviationz den
Stranger: i m gettin angry n irritated n want 2 punch u now..huh!!
You: oh ya?
You: well,,, i …
You: I think your stupid!
You: there!
You: i said it!
Stranger: thanku
Stranger: late realisation
You: I think your …stupid.
Stranger: ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
You: Oh who am i kidding?? I love you! I didn’t mean it! Take me back Betty!
Stranger: shut up…
You: Lets go to Haiwaii
Stranger: i was enjoyin the humour earlier….but not any more…
You: Grab your grass skirt Betty , we’re going to hawaii
Stranger: u continue 2 b funny
You: You are really demanding.
Stranger: thats better
Stranger: but stop cracking jokes on me…
You: I feel like i should be getting paid for this
Stranger: hahahahhahaa….
Stranger: thank god
You: customer is always right i guess
Stranger: hmm..u seem 2 b a typical business man..huh!!
You: So why’d the chicken cross the road?
Stranger: uffoo…i dont kno..
You: Fuck, who cares? That joke is so overdone.
Stranger:
You: I eat that chickens wings and legs. mm
Stranger: i m a vegetarian
You: tastes like velociraptor
You: I’m on a strict stone and rock only diet
Stranger: hahhahahaa…u seem 2 b a veg. dinosaur…lol!
You: Im a Tofusaur
You: roar!
Stranger: kkk….i dnt care wich evr saur u r…
You: …ROAR!!…cough…cough…ahem..
You: You don’t care much for dinos huh?
Stranger: n if u cntinu ur saurs or whatever i il shoot u with my ak 47 gun..
You: ya right!
You: you can shoot people through the interwebs?
You: Your dangerous
Stranger: u dont kno my dadys source,lol!
You: Stranger danger!
Stranger: hmm..i kno..so better b carefull nxt time..
You: So whats life in India like?
You: Do you like food with curry?
Stranger: u kno i hav been thinkin, u have a great potential 2 chit chat early morning..hats off…
Stranger: hmm….yes, at times, not ol wys…
You: I love curry
You: it makes me feel exotic
Stranger: kk..gr8..
You: oooh.
You: curry
Stranger: stp thinkin abt curry 4 some time plz
You: So, I think i’m going to go eat something with curry on it now..
Stranger: hahahhaaa…
You: Thanks for putting up with me,
Stranger: hey
You: and Stay alert, Stay safe
Stranger: just answer one question plz
Stranger: last
You: never click links
Stranger: yea yea i understood…
You: ok, whats your question. Then im gone like the wind baby
Stranger: wats ur actual age???
You: 26
Stranger: hahaha,,k…
Stranger: u can leave now, n njoy ur breakfast
You: catch ya later. And do some research on dinosaurs!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=im3d1oNwbUg
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hello
Stranger: HI
You: whats your name stranger?
Stranger: Timmy
You: how old are you timmy?
Stranger: 12
You: ahh
You: do you like girls?
Stranger: yes
You: what about boys?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: I LIKE EVERYTHING
You: oh thats cool
You: hmm
You: would you like a lolipop?
Stranger: yes
You: ok
You: well i have one
You: it’s the best tasting lolipop
You: jsut close your eyes and open your mouth
Stranger: lol
Stranger: you sick bastard
Stranger: do you go on omegle to get your sick pleasures with little kids
Stranger: you should be ashamed of yourself
You: it’s an orange flavored tootsie pop?
You: >.<
Stranger: lol
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: 18 male here
You: Unless you take it up the arse, I wouldn’t be winking. I’m the same >.<
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
She was carrying a Strawberry Poptart!
You: I’m looking for a Russian Mail Order Bride! Have you seen one?
Stranger: yes i have she brke in to my house last night
You:
You: That damn ho!
You: I told her to quit doing that and raping puppies!
Stranger: she tried to steal all poptarts to
You:
Stranger: you need to control her
You: I am so sorry!
Stranger: it ok
You: I know!!!! I’m trying to train that bitch.
Stranger: is she crazy
You: But all she does is speak gibberish!
You: She won’t speak American!
Stranger: does she have a menatal health problem
Stranger: damn thats no good at all
You: I know!
You: She’s like crazy psycho!!!
Stranger: you should really get her some help
You: I should probably stop giving her cocaine!
Stranger: that would be a good i dea
You: Yeah…
Stranger: how much do you give her a day
You: But I need her because she’s a good prostitute!
You: I give her a few lines about every 30 minutes.
Stranger: that makes sence then keep her
Stranger: damn then she must be out of it
You: Lol!
Stranger: fuck
You: Most of the time!
Stranger: haha
You: Unless she’s working
Stranger: aw thats shit. she must be a beast then
You: You know it!!!!
You: Gives the best head!
You: No gag reflex!
You: I cut it out of her throat.
Stranger: haha good thing
Stranger: haha very good
You: Yup.
Stranger: she must like the cock or the coke
You: She enjoys both!!!
You: I think…
You: Fuck if I know!
Stranger: haha i bet she does
Stranger: give her more coke
You: Yeah… And more heroin poptarts!
Stranger: yea and tell not to steal mine
You: I will.
Stranger: or my dogs
You: Sorry about that. D:
Stranger: no big deal dont let it happen again
You: Well, thanks for the info. I’ll be sure to pick her up soon.
Stranger: my dog almost ate her
You: O.o
You: Oh, dear!
You: Hope he didn’t mess up her face!
Stranger: yea shes really skinny
You: All she’ll eat are those damn poptarts!
Stranger: my dog thought she was a bone
Stranger: no wonder damn herion
Stranger: fuck shes going to die if she has any more
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Another cool site where you can kinda do the same thing but chat with random people near you is cuyx.com
There’s also pictures so you can see who you’re chatting with.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hello
Stranger: Hi
You: age/species/location?
Stranger: 17, human, earth
You: omg
You: same
You: except for
You: i’m 393 years old
Stranger: HOLY SHIT
You: yeah well
You: because i only have one radiation suit…
Stranger: I can haz?
You: well see that’s the problem
Stranger: Gimme
You: i can’t give it to you because i only HAVE 1 radiation suit
You: besides
Stranger: I want
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: f horny with webcam ?
You: hi
You: m horny with no life, thats what you are, call me batblaster
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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I thought i’d get somewhere with this convo…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I’m bored
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: me too
You: thats why we are here
You: call me batblaster
Stranger: why?
You: because i like that nickname
You: helps break the anomity somewhat. Pardon my spelling
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
or save this log or send us feedback.